under the deep sombre sky, we can hear everything. the footsteps in the upper room, the snore from the neighbor's house, the chatter on the cell phone, my anger beating against the wall. it's wafer thin. wear me out, skin by skin, tissue by tissue, drip me dry till this desire is smite. what good is there to be without emotion? what good is there to be distant and still so broken?
there is always an easy way out. distractions with the good things like church, like charity, like chasing bright colored neon rainbows. or there's another being we can snuggle up to, all warm and safe, under a blanket, under the big grey sky, under the stars that shine. underneath it all, learning to engage again with mankind, how we are meant to be, how we are to respect our shadows.
i just want to work this through, is it so hard to give just an inch that will make all the difference? nicotine and rum, they shall be my poison to carry me into my deep sleep.
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